Mapp & Lucia: Good Neighbors
by gee-de-valois
Summary: Mapp & Lucia battle...when everyone in Tilling knows something that Mapp doesn't, it drives her insane and she'll do anything to find out what it is.


_I don't own Mapp, Lucia, or any of the Tillingites in this story. Mapp & Lucia is property of E.F. Benson and Granada._

**_Chapter One_**

The sun was rather hot in Tilling-upon-Sea that July afternoon, especially in the steamy town hall, where it was a genuine sauna. No part of the town was cool that day - from Curfew Street to St. Cecilia's to even Grebe out on the marshes. Those who could stay inside did and occupied themselves with an easy task near an open window.

However, this was not the case for Lucia Pillson, the honorable mayor of Tilling, who sat at her desk enveloped in the heat. With a mass of work in front of her, she found it hard to concentrate with the occasional bead of sweat that dripped from her brow. "A disgusting, unsanitary habit" is what Lucia had always thought of sweat, and for this very reason she detested working in the town hall during these hot summer months. However, she had no choice. Lucia would have to to respect her mayoral duties or give up the job altogether. The latter was certainly not an option - if she did, this would mean a forfeit and a victory for Elizabeth Mapp.

With this thought in her head, Lucia returned to her work. When it seemed she had finally focused her attention on her tasks, she became aware that somebody was standing in front of her. Lucia raised her head and peered out from above her reading glasses.

"...Yes?" Mr. Bernard, a board member, was standing before Lucia and offering her small folder of papers.

"It's the..." the man's eyes glanced over at Mrs. Mapp-Flint - "it's, um, the papers you wanted, your Worship."

"Oh! Oh, thank you, dear Mr. Bernard." Lucia's gloved hand took the folder from him.

"Very welcome, Ma'm." Bernard turned, lifted his bag from his desk, and exited the room. Only Mapp and Pillson remained now.

Several moments of silence passed, only interrupted by the occasional rifle of papers of the scratch of a fountain-pen.

"Lulu," began Mapp, "what _were_ those papers, Lulu?"

"Oh! Nothing, just nothing." Lucia glanced quickly at Mapp, who was sitting at the desk in front of her.

"Nothing?" questioned Elizabeth.

"Yes, yes, nothing at all."

Several moments passed again in silence. Mapp put down her pen and folded her hands on her desk.

"Lulu, if the papers are simply nothing, may I please see them?"

Without looking up, Lucia replied:

"I'm sorry, but you can't".

"Lucia," began Mapp, "good friends though we are, as your mayoress, I must request that you show me those papers." Pillson sighed and looked up at Mapp.

"Elizabeth, good friends though we are, I must forbid you from seeing these documents." And with that Lucia placed them in her desk and locked them away.

Mapp eyed Lucia for a moment before resuming her work.

After about half an hour of akward tension, Lucia sighed, folded her glasses and cleared the folders from the tabletop. Mapp looked up.

"I think I shall go home now, Elizabeth. It's nearly five and I need to see Grosvenor about something." She rose from her chair and pushed it in.

"Oh, I think I'll go too, Lulu. My Benjy-Boy just withers without my company."

"I'm quite sure he does, Elizabeth."

Once the doors were locked and everything was in order, they were out the door, up the street, and walking past St. Cecilia's Church. The sun was finally becoming less brutal and the slight breeze that stirred was very welcome.

"Do you need a ride home, Elizabeth? I'm sure Cadman can take you Grebe." said Lucia.

"Oh, no, don't worry Lulu, a nice brisk walk should give me some exercise. I find with all this work nowadays, I rarely spend anytime outside. You wouldn't think one could miss Tilling so much."

"Yes, quite", Lucia nodded.

"Do have a nice evening.", Mapp said as Mallards was approaching.

"Why thank you, dear, I shall." said Lucia, pausing for a second before she would turn to go home. "Au Resevoir, Elizabeth."

"Au Resevoir, Lulu."

Mapp hurried on her way, but stopped to watch Lucia descend the small hill to her pink house. Gently sniffing, she continued on her way.

****

"Hello, Georgie."

"Oh, hello, dear Lucia!" said Georgie cheerily as Lucia entered the door. She handed her hat and shawl to Grosvenor and came to sit in a chair accross from her husband. Lucia sighed and adjusted a pillow behind her back.

"Oh, please tell me about your day, darling." asked Georgie, sipping a cold glass of water as he put aside his book.

"Oh, nothing _too_ special, dear. Elizabeth is still probing every paper that comes under my eye and is becoming exceedingly difficult to handle."

Georgie nodded in agreement.

"Ever since we told her that the Tilling Society picnic has been cancelled, she has been very suspicious and has refused to believe it. I won't be able to take much more of this."

"Oh, yes, Lucia. Very unfortunate." he replied, gently shaking his head.

****

"Hello, My Benjy-Boy."

"Oh, hello Elizabeth!" said Benjy cheerily as Mapp entered the door. She handed her hat and shawl to Withers and came to sit in a chair accross from her husband. Elizabeth sighed and adjusted a pillow behind her back.

"So what were you up to all afternoon in town?" asked Major Benjy, downing a glass of scotch.

"Oh, nothing _too_ special, dear. Lucia is still refusing to let me see anything of importance. Recently she has completely left me out of the loop and is becoming exceedingly difficult to handle."

Benjy nodded in agreement.

"Ever since she told me that the Tilling Society picnic was off this year, she has deliberately cut me off from any information. I won't be able to take much more of this."

"Oh, yes, Elizabeth. Not very good." he replied, furrowing his brow and refilling his cup.

****

The next day, around noon, Mapp was driven in to town to visit Godiva, whom she often enjoyed complaining and spreading gossip too. Once she came past West Tower and into town, she encountered Quaint Irene. Mapp instructed her driver to stop and she rolled down her window.

"Goodness, Quaint Ireney, warm today, isn't it?"

"Reckon it is", replied Irene. "So where are you off to, Mapp?"

"To have a nice chat with Diva."

"Ah, to go spoil good Lucia's name, you mean."

"Don't be silly. I intend nothing of the sort."

"Right, Mapp, right. I'll see you later."

And with that, the car continued on its way.

Once they had reached Godiva's house, Elizabeth got out and arranged to be picked up in about an hour outside the fruititer. The auto made its way back to Grebe and Mapp approached the door.

A few moments after she rang the doorbell, Diva's maid answered the door and let her inside. From the foyer she could hear Godiva and Padre's voices. Mapp took a step closer and leaned in the direction of the parlour, in hope of hearing something, if only a snippet.

"...just make sure Elizabeth doesn't..." was all she heard before the maid interupted with:

"Mrs. Mapp-Flint is here to see you, Ma'am."

Something was whispered, a chair creeked and the vicar said hello to Mapp before plucking his hat from a hook and leaving.

Once the maid had left and the Padre was gone, Elizabeth came and sat at a table with Godiva, who had been knitting something.

"Hello, Diva!"

"Hello, Elizabeth", she replied, "how are you today?"

"Oh, very good, Diva, very good. But thirsty - might you have something to drink?" Diva nodded and pressed the button beside the table where they were seated. Almost instantly the maid reappeared.

"Yes, Ma'am?" she asked.

"Just two waters please." said Diva. The maid left.

"Is there any paticular reason you came here, Elizabeth?" Godiva queried. "Or just to talk? You always seem to have the latest gossip available." Diva blinked twice.

"Yes, there is a reason. Oh Diva, good-"

"...Friends though we are, yes, yes, Mapp, what do you want?" asked Godiva, annoyed with the words Mapp used whenever she wanted to probe you for something.

"Well, I was thinking, the whole town council of Tilling, especially Lucia, has been quite secretive lately, and I can't help but think that everyone knows something that I don't. You wouldn't know of anything like this, would you, Diva?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, of course not, Elizabeth." Diva said.

"You're absolutely sure?"

"Of course, Mapp. I'm sure you are just imagining it." reassured Diva.

"...Godiva, what were you saying about me with the Padre?"

Diva's eyes slightly widened and she blinked.

"I wasn't saying anything, Elizabeth."

"Yes you were."

"No, I assure you I wasn't." she protested, looking Mapp square in the eye.

"Oh, then", said Mapp, fluttering her eyes while looking up and sniffing, "that's all I needed to know. Now I must get to the fruititer and buy some lettuce, we're fresh out at Grebe." Mapp stood up and pushed in her chair. Diva smiled at her.

"Thanks for coming, Elizabeth. I hope you and Major Benjy can still join me for lunch tommorow?"

"Oh, of course Diva. We wouldn't _dream_ of missing it. Au Resevoir!" Mapp smiled and was out the door as soon as two icy glasses of water were deposited on the table.

Diva brought hers to the window, sipped it, and watched Mapp leave.

****

_Reviews appreciated. And yes, this will be continued._


End file.
